My Observations About Life in Dubai

There was a Korean bar about three blocks from my house called Dubai. Large, black, letters backlit with blue LED lights spelled out Dubai right above the lone front door. The kind of blue that was once used exclusively for those buzzing bug lamps. Often, I found myself wondering, what goes on in there?

I have never been to Dubai. In fact that bar is the closets I have ever come to being anywhere near Dubai. But I do wonder. What is life like in the UAE? What is life like in Dubai for the princely Sheiks? How are they treated? Would I enjoy living in the UAE if I wasn’t a sheik?

Now that I have officially made the pics of this family my life, I am putting together clues about life in the UAE. Such as Observation 1: it is hot and sunny: given the geographic location, I’m not taking any risks in assuming this is true. Observation 2, and this might be taking a risk but I’m going for it, the country is sparsely populated. There are no crowd scenes in any of the photos or videos.

Also, I’m thinking Observation 3: Dubai Must Be A Very Friendly Place.
In fact, Dubai may be the friendliest and kindest place on earth. Why?
I hear that the so-fine-sheiks roam around the country and its major cities without security and without being hassled by mobs. That is astounding to me. Frankly it is unimaginable to my American mind. You are famous. You are rich. You are attractive to boot and no one is running after you trying to tear you limb from limb. I don’t understand that. I get hassled when my hair is freshly did; oh and btw, I ain’t got no money. How do these fools rule a country and no one is running after them?

Observation 4: Fazza3 is the most popular Al Maktoum. He is clearly nice and down-to-earth. Why? He is smiling the widest in all pictures, always kissing animals (camel kissing…do I need say more?) and pausing for a candid picture with his right arm wrapped happily around the neck of said person.

Now since they look so much alike, Fazza and his brother Rashid, maybe some of those pictures are Rashid and not Fazza. Eeeeh, I don’t think so. If these pictures are copyright protected they typically have the Fazza3 symbol and not the little horsey head which is Rashid. I do remember seeing some stills of an Al Maktoum shiek playing soccer with a child on the beach (cute little boy; 5-8 year old). But again, it was on Fazza3’s webpage if I remember correctly. He stops playing with the child to give him a kiss. (Isn’t that loveable?) Meanwhile, Rashid has a video clip of himself calling dudes into a room to show them his new webpage on a flat screen. It is an Awesome new website, don’t get me wrong. (Have you voted? www.sh-rashid.net) However, that seems a little arrogant to me.

America has no royalty but we do kiss the asses of the rich and powerful. A digression to illustrate, GW Bush’s entire presidency was just one guy surrounded by a bunch of ass kissers: Smart ass-kissers; marginally more credible ass-kissers; but all ass-kissers because none of them ever said to GW; ‘You’re wrong. Go fuck yourself.’ Consequently, Rashid’s self congratulatory video clip, doesn’t pull at my heart strings the same way Fazza’s beach soccer scene does; even though it may have been staged for effect also.